I grew up in church, but I never understood what it meant to have a personal relationship with Jesus. I just went through the motions and had no real concept of the Gospel.

Because of this, when I went off to college, religion became less appealing to me, and I was the classic “church girl gone wild.” I drank, partied, had sex, got into a toxic, sinful relationship, and it all seemed fun—for a night. But something was still missing.

Failed relationships, trauma, sexual abuse, depression, and multiple suicide attempts left me riddled with pain. Why did it feel like my emotional baggage was so unbearable? Better yet, why didn’t God care? How could a perfect God let all this happen to me?

The truth is, He did care. I just had the false perception that my pain didn’t matter to God. I thought expressing negative emotions meant I was a bad Christian. And it wasn’t until I got honest, shook my fists at God, and called Him a sadistic freak that I finally had a breakthrough. He had been there all along. And He wasn’t to blame for my pain. He had never left my side, even when I left His.

When I finally accepted the truth that God cared about all of me, even the messy, painful parts, I started to experience healing and wholeness. I showed up more healthy in my friendships, my self-image healed, and I started to walk confidently as the woman God created me to be.

If you’ve ever felt broken, empty, lonely, rejected, like you don’t want to live, or like you’d never make it to see another day—me too. No matter where you are on your journey, you’re welcome here. Jesus welcomes you.

He has been my rock. He is the reason I’m alive today.

He’s the reason I want to help women like you become whole and experience meaningful relationships with Jesus and others. Please know that help is available, healing is possible, and hope is already here.