Welcome to the blog.
This is a place to process the “hard stuff” we feel from a biblical perspective. No churchy lingo. No judgment. All honesty.
A Sneak Peek into Her Thorns Book
A sneak peek into my debut book, Her Thorns, releasing January 12, 2024.
Boundaries Around the Holidays
So, the holidays are here. That can either bring up positive or negative feelings for you. Fighting, rude comments, and invasive inquiries are all part of the holiday season hustle and bustle for some people. The holidays can be difficult whether you’re married, single, or widowed.
He Said, She Said (Part 3): 4 Practical Ways to Avoid Gossip
So, you’re around someone who wants to gossip. What do you do? It can be difficult to go against the crowd and not participate in gossip, but here are four practical ways to do it. This is part 3 of a gossip series.
He Said, She Said (Part 2): The Ultimate Guide For Identifying Gossip
Gossip almost always leaves a lasting, negative effect. It’s hard to scrub off, it’s hard to forget, and it leaves an impact on both the person you’re gossiping with and the person you’re talking about. How can we identify gossip?
He Said, She Said (Part 1): Moving From Gossipers to Good Neighbors
A few years ago, a new friend invited me to lunch. Well into the conversation, she looked at me and said, “So, the reason I invited you to lunch is to talk to you about something,” in a very serious tone. My stomach dropped. What could I have possibly done wrong already in this newly developing friendship?
His Blood Covers Mental Illness, Too: Looking for Jesus in Times of Darkness
If you’re anything like me, your family and church growing up told you that mental illness wasn’t real and you just needed to pray more. Not only is it incredibly harmful to dismiss someone’s battle with mental illness, but it’s also not a true representation of broken humanity in desperate need of Jesus. I think people forget that Jesus came and died for a reason. Because of sin, there is brokenness in this world. This includes illness and sickness of all kinds.
The 5 Languages of Apology: Learning How to Say “I’m Sorry”
If you have relationships and connections with people, there will come a time you’ll need to apologize. It doesn’t matter if it’s a significant other, your mom, brother, friend, or mentor — we are all bound to hurt someone and need to say sorry.
Living Loved: A Single’s Guide for Valentine’s Day
Maybe you dread Valentine’s Day because it reminds you that you’re single and don’t want to be. Maybe this holiday reminds you of a painful heartbreak. Whichever side of the spectrum you fall on, I get it, and I’ve been there. There’s room and grace for it all.
They Can’t Be Your Everything: Support vs. Sustenance
Growing up in a broken home caused me to look for love, affection, and validation in other people. Because my parents didn’t need my emotional needs, I tried to get them met in all my friendships. This led to unhealthy attachment, particularly codependency. I became a leech to everyone I was attached to.
99 Problems & Identity is One
I sat in my therapist’s office three years ago, and she just listened to me speak. Let’s call her Ava. Pretty early on, Ava told me I had identity issues. Even though I’m pretty open in therapy, when you hear that you have identity problems, it kind of rubs you the wrong way. I don’t have identity issues, I thought. I know who I am. But the truth is, I didn’t.
An Open Letter To The Person Struggling To Forgive
Acknowledge the offense, but be free. Be free from the chains of unforgiveness. Be free from the pain that swallows you up every day. Be free from the heartache you’re experiencing.
The Breakup No One Talks About
I started seeing a therapist because this friendship in particular brought out some very ugly parts of me that needed healing. I was raised in a home that didn’t talk about mental health issues. It was considered taboo and weak. But I was determined to break that stigma.
To The Girl Who Prefers Guy Friends
I was addicted to the way positive words from guys made me feel. It was like they had something to offer that women couldn’t. I didn’t see the value of friendship with women because I honestly thought they couldn’t offer me much. Women brought the exact same thing I brought to the table, so what did I need them for?
Dear Lust, We’re Breaking Up With You | Part 2
Over the years, I think the church has tried so hard not to make sex a “thing” that we’ve made it a thing. But I don’t think talking about it was ever the issue. Because even when we do talk about it, so many of us are still getting it wrong. We’re still falling into the grips of lust.
Dear Lust, We’re Breaking Up With You | Part 1
I recently heard a woman say whenever you’re feeling turned on, pause and thank God for this feeling. This blew me away, y’all. Never have I EVER thanked God for being horny. But then I asked myself, why? Why do I immediately shame myself instead of thanking God for creating my body to feel?
Grief & Gratitude: Can We Have Both?
Contrary to popular belief, you can feel sad and still acknowledge the good things happening in your life, and you can also feel happy, but create room to feel the bad things that have happened in your life. This is how we heal.
Codependent, much?
Quite often I used to find myself in “situationships” and friendships with guys who loved parts of me, but only the parts that benefited them. It honestly used to feel “good.” I was super broken with (clear) identity issues. But I was getting the attention I desired, so I overlooked the warning signs that I was becoming extremely codependent. I felt like I was valuable because they would give me words of affirmation, seek my advice, use my creativity, or want to spend time with me.
Am I Healed Yet?
I was showing up as a hot mess in my friendships, lying and manipulating to feel loved, having frequent panic attacks, and fighting depression. After my second suicide attempt, I knew it was time to seek help.